The Yarn Basket
by TeaspoonChild
Summary: 100 Drabble Challenge! Various pairings. Number VII: Hyper Satanic Acid 4/4: Roxas and Xion have a small misunderstanding while training with Vexen, leading to panic within the Organisation. Poor Axel has to figure out what happened.
1. Claque

Disclaimer: I don't own it, blah, blah, whatever.

**Claque: An audience or a part of an audience that is paid to clap after an act/performance.**

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Claque:

Setzer was seething. He couldn't believe he was doing this. It was all that damned blond kid's fault.

'You know what to do?' He asked the three teenagers before him.

They nodded, barely able to contain their laughter. Their leader, Hayner, held out his hand.

'Munny first, old man.'

Setzer gritted his teeth and gave the children the agreed sum of munny. As he watched them run off, no longer trying to contain their mirth, he brightened, and winked at a passing girl.

After all, paying crowds to cheer for him was hardly the lowest that Setzer had ever sunk.

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**A/N: The 'blond kid' can be either Seifer or Roxas, whichever way you choose to read it. I was thinking of Seifer when I wrote this, but it doesn't really matter. **


	2. Girls like Kairi

**Girls like Kairi.**

**Summary: Its girls like Kairi that get boys like Axel into trouble…**

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She comes to school, dressed up like _that_, always so goddamn _provocative_. Every. Damn. Day. And he can't touch her.

She doesn't look underage, Axel thinks. He would know. He's spent more than his fair amount of time looking. But he can't touch, can't take those skimpy little clothes off her anywhere except in his own mind. **OR ELSE**.

There's no way that any fourteen year old should be allowed to dress like that, like a _woman_, but she did, her friends did, and they thought nothing of it.

Its girls like Kairi that get boys like Axel into trouble.

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**A/N: This is actually based on a conversation I had at school, with some friends, about how girls as young as eight or nine are being marketed the sort of clothes that no child should wear, and how the media is slowly turning children into sex symbols. **

**…Just in case anyone's interested…**


	3. Clueless

Drabble 3: **Clueless**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I could own something, I'd own Roxas. But I don't.  
**

Pairing: Axel/Roxas

Gernre: Humour (Vaguely. VERY vaguely. Stupid hundred word limit...)

Summary: Roxas doesn't know what to do with his vacation. Axel has a suggestion.

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"Oh, hey, Roxas. You hear about this vacation? About time we had a day off."

"I've never had a vacation before."

"Is that right?"

"What's my job during vacation?"

"What's your-- Roxas, you're really missing the point."

"It's not my fault I've never had one. I don't know what to do."

"Do what you like."

"But...I don't know what I like. What are you gonna do, Axel?"

"Me? I'm spending the entire day in bed."

"Don't you spend enough time in bed?"

"And you don't spend enough. Want some help with that?"

"Huh?"

"Ah, never mind… you're so clueless, kid."

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I was planning to make it longer, but I thought including the original script was probably necessary. So I only had about five words to work with. Even after I cut down one of Axel's lines. Someone should invent the 150-word drabble.

Reviews are always welcome! Especially constructive criticisms!


	4. Hyper Satanic Acid, Part 1

**Drabble 4: Hyper Satanic acid, part one**

**Characters: Roxas, Xion, Vexen.**

**Genre: Humour**

**Summary: Roxas and Xion are taking chemistry lessons from Vexen. A simple misunderstanding, however, causes mayhem. Part 1/3.**

**Disclaimer: This is Roxas/ His eyes are blue/ I don't own him/ So please don't sue!**

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In the dark dungeons of the Castle That Never Was, the Organisation's Numbers XIII and XIV were completing a different sort of mission: To learn, from a certain more senior agent, the properties and uses of various chemical compounds in combat. Today, the subject was acids.

"This one, children, is called-" The speaker was interrupted by Roxas' scream when the boy read the label.

"Run, Xion!"

The two children fled the room.

"…Hydroastatic acid." Vexen finished to the empty room. He didn't know what to make of his pupils' reaction, so the next logical step must be to inform Saïx.

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**The next two will be up as quickly as possible. Also, expect pretty much everything I write in the near future to be based on science classes. For some reason, the plot bunnies like it there.**

**Thanks to my reviewers, favouriters and alerters!**


	5. Hyper Satanic Acid, Part 2

**Number V: Hyper Satanic Acid, Part II.**

**Summary: Xion and Roxas try to gain Axel's protection against the "evil" Vexen. Poor Axel has to figure out just what the heck is going on.**

**Genre: Humour**

**Characters: Axel, Roxas, Xion.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts. I tried to buy it off the organisation, but I realised that a moon was not going to fit in my house, so I reluctantly cancelled the transaction. **

Axel hastily snuffed out his cigarette as his favourite Nobodies came running towards him, in a state of sheer panic.

"What now, chatterboxes?"

"Vexen tried to de-Holy us so we'll go to Hell when we die!"

Axel groaned, silently cursing the Superior and his divinity complex that had tricked Roxas and Xion into believing that Nobodies were actually angels.

"Nobodies are not Holy beings, we don't go anywhere when we die, **have you** **got it memorised**?" he snapped at them.

"But he had Hyper Satanic Acid!"

Poor Axel had no idea what they were talking about. Maybe Vexen would know.


	6. Hyper Satanic Acid, Part 3

**Title: Hyper Satanic Acid, part 3/4.**

**Characters: Xemnas, Vexen, Roxas, Xion, Axel.**

**Word Count: 100**

**Genre: Humour**

**Disclaimer: I don't own it, and I'm tired, so I'm not even going to be witty about not owning it.**

**Summary: Vexen explains to the Superior what he did to the two Keyblade wielders, prompting mass panic.**

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The "Holy" Superior, despite being emotionless, was terrified by this "Hyper Satanic Acid".

"You, Number IV, abused your position of trust and exposed my two Keyblade wielders to potentially de-Holifying chemicals?"

Vexen sweat dropped.

"No, Superior! They misread the label! It was just acid!"

Perhaps in an attempt to prove his point, Vexen produced a bottle of the substance from his robe and brandished it at the Superior, who, terrified of losing his "divinity", ran screaming in the other direction. He was joined by Roxas and Xion, whom Axel had not yet succeeded in convincing of the acid's relative harmlessness.


	7. Hyper Satanic Acid, Part 4

**Title: Hyper Satanic Acid, Part 4/4 (Yes, I realise that by the time I get 4 interconnected drabbles, it becomes a very short chaptered fic, but I'm done with this mini-series now! Honest!)**

**Genre: Humour**

**Characters: Most of Organisation XIII, but they're only mentioned.**

**Disclaimer: Yes, of course I own Kingdom Hearts! How could you suggest otherwise? …Dimwit.**

**Summary: What happened after the day of Acidic terror?**

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As a result of the "HAS Incident", Vexen resigned as Roxas and Xion's teacher. The job was given to Axel and Zexion- Axel because he could usually translate for either party, and Zexion because he actually knew what he was doing in matters that were not directly related to the lighting of fires.

The Superior, fearing that his divine-ness would be "UnHolied", banned the substance known as "Hyper Satanic Acid" from all parts of The World That Never Was. Secretly, Demyx, Axel, Larxene, Xigbar, and Marluxia each have hidden stashes in case they ever get a chance to prank Xemnas.


End file.
